Good Morning and welcome to this week’s edition of INSPIRATIONAL TIDBITS.  The intent of the Tidbits is sort of like you’re on a trip, and you suddenly turn down a side road to see the “home of the world’s largest frying pan” to break up the routine.  Or something like that.  Don’t we live in a wonderful time where we can all benefit from the wonders of modern technology? Computers, internet, automobiles, digital photos, and medicine…. For instance, check out these new drugs that are made specifically for women (but some may be strong enough for a man).
 
ST. MOMMA'S WORT - Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to two days
 
EMPTYNESTROGEN - Eliminates melancholy and loneliness by reminding you of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait until they moved out.
 
JACKASSPIRIN - Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary or phone number.
 
DAMMITOL - Take 2, and the rest of the world can pack sand for up to 8 full hours.
 
PEPTOBIMBO - Liquid silicone drink for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases chest size, decreases intelligence, and provides birth control.
 
MENICILLIN - Potent anti-boy-otic for older women. Increases resistance to such lethal lines as, "I’m really tired of immature girls my own age".
 
BUYAGRA - Stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency, duration, and credit limit of spending spree.
 
Hello, Doc?  I think I need a prescription for this next one:
 
FLIPITOR - Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.
 
The BRAINSQUEEZERS.  If it were any more fun than this, we’d all have to go home.
 
1.  Which state produces a large percentage of the world’s cranberries?  ( Minnesota; Massachusetts; Michigan )
 
2.  Pepper is the #1 selling spice in the world – what is #2?  ( cinnamon; curry; mustard )
 
3.  The first supermarket chain in the US was ( A&P; Kroger; Piggly Wiggly )
 
4.  What will Pesco-vegetarians NOT eat?  ( red meat; dairy products; meat that is not raised “free range” )
 
5.  What topping to most Australians prefer on their pizza?  ( squid; sardines; eggs )
 
TIEBREAKER: How many different animals are represented by Animal Crackers? 
 
OBSCURE EXTRA BONUS QUESTION:  Authentic Italian Mozzarella cheese is made from the milk of which animal?
 

This is the exciting part where we announce who the winner is.  It’s CAROLEE, who got 4 out of 5 to beat out a large group of second-placers who each got 3.  No tiebreaker required today, but those answers went from 4 up to 50.  Nobody got the obscure question right, and by far, the most popular answer was “goat”.  But think about it - that really wouldn’t be so obscure, now would it?  Sheep and Irish Wolfhound (from the smart alec) also got votes, and the answer “buffalo or goat not quite sure” was not acceptable, I’m afraid.  Congrats to Carolee on the win today – see you next time.

MJB