Good Morning and welcome to this week’s edition of INSPIRATIONAL TIDBITS.  Hey, actual rain in the Spring, just like up North!  I hope that yesterday’s storm gives you a real reason to crank up your lawnmower this weekend. But right now, it's time to further your education in the ever-changing world of Political Correctness.  If you want to say something about that woman over there, remember...she might have a lawyer, so use these PC phrases just in case.

She is not DUMB, she just happens to be on a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY

She doesn't NAG YOU, she simply is being VERBALLY REPETITIVE

She doesn't get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK, she becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL

She doesn't wear TOO MUCH MAKEUP, she has reached COSMETIC SATURATION

She's not an airhead - she's REALITY IMPAIRED

She hasn't gotten fat - she has simply achieved MAXIMUM DENSITY

She has not "been around" - she is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION

She's not a bleach blonde - she's PEROXIDE DEPENDENT

Gimmee a “B”!  Gimmee an “R”!....... etc.  What’s that smell?  BRAINSQUEEZERS. Show your spirit and enter!  Cheers (Cheers - get it?).
 
1.  The largest member of the Weasel family is the ( Wolverine, Badger, Porcupine ) 
 
2.  Redhaven, Fairhaven, and Sunhaven are all varieties of what fruit? (peach; plum; grape ) 
 
3.  Pewter is mostly ( Tin, Copper, Iron ) 
 
4.  Charlie Chaplin was the highest-paid actor in 1916, making how much a week?  ( $100, $1000, $10000 )  
 
5.  A thin and wiry person has which body type?  ( endomorphic; mesomorphic; ectomorphic ) 
 
TIEBREAKER:  How many weeks did Pink Floyd’s “Dark Side of the Moon” stay on the Top 200 Billboard chart?  A WHOPPING 741 - OVER 14 YEARS
 
EXTRA OBSCURE BONUS QUESTION:  Tabasco sauce is named after what?  A RIVER IN MEXICO
 

How ’bout that Floyd?  Their album was in the top 200 from 1973 ‘til 1987!!  Amazing record (pun intended).  As for today, our outright winner is PHIL, who got four right.  Charley Norman, Brian, Dan & Mike V shared second place with three right (where were all the ladies today?).  Unnecessary tiebreaker answers went from 5 weeks up to 542, and most answers were much more towards the lower end.  Nobody got the obscure one right today, with guesses including a town, the Tabasco pepper, a Mexican dance, a city, and the inventor of the sauce.  One skunk today, alas, alas.  Congrats to Phil on the win, & you’d better be kind to the guest host next week. ‘cause I’ll be checking.  SEEYA.

MJB